by Helen Spaw
A reflection on masking from a recent Healing Art Circle gathering.
Inside shining through on the outside… Have tried to cover what is inside, which has created pain and shame. There are moments when the inside does shine through, but not sure when. Figuring out how to focus on the love, and not feeling like I deserve the love. Healing that is trying to happen, actively working on things, not sure what else I can do to heal, not always present. Looking at the masks, seeing how everyone is dealing with healing in different ways.
Witnessing how each person is aware of the inside of themselves is healing. Hard to think about the inside… it is painful, stressful. Everyone sharing…hard to make the outside mask because the inside comes out everyday.
The masks make me think of the people that have hurt me… how their insides must be very hurt, and that is why they continue to hurt me. I pray that God heals their insides.
There is a saying at work that “We are powerless when our lives have become unmanageable.” When I was upset about many things at work, my co-worker says, “Are you powerless yet?” Finding that I don’t hold it together, and realizing that God has control. Accepting that I need healing and letting God do the work.
Feeling focused on actively working on everything, I need to let go to trust that God can do the healing work. Taking the good pieces of the outside parts of the masks: strength, love of everyone, sense of humor, and confidence.
----
Healing Art Circles are held at St. Paul's, facilitated in English and Spanish. Everyone is welcome; come as often as you'd like. Learn more by contacting Rev. Nataly Negrete via nataly@stpaulshouston.org.